Tarifa

Tarifa -  sounds like Spanish for tariff.  No me gusta!
Tarifa- sounds like Spanish for taffy.  Me gusta!!

Actually, Tarifa is a town at the bottom of Spain and one of the main entry ways into Morocco.  It was the only reason we headed there.  As it turned out, it has a wonderful beach
and the quickest entry into Morocco.


(I took this picture of a billboard advertising Tarifa!  Standing on my tip toes just didn't give me the elevated shot that I was looking for!  Hence, when in need...plagiarize!)

Classic:  Some days you are the pigeon and some days you are the statue.  When you are the statue too often...change parks!

There aren't many photos of specifically Tarifa.  Think San Diego circa 1929.  Yeah, small, but manageable.  We stayed in a hostel 3 blocks from the beach.  We both liked it a great deal.  It was good for Zack because at about midnight, he and about 20 others from the hostel would go out... and not with DAD.  What a drag I must be!!!  I don't blame him one bit.




Anyway, here are some random pictures that were taken in Tarifa, but could have been just about anywhere in Spain.  They are meant to give you some ideas of normal life in Spain.

What does the CIA want with this old man?  The answer is at the end of this post.

These are Tapas.  Every restaurant has tapas.  They are overpriced little portions for the most part, unless you have a stomach the size of a bird, or just aren't hungry.  They are fun, however.  Four of us went out the other night and ordered 7 or 8 tapas, a 6E bottle of wine, and six 1.5E beers and the bill was 38E or roughly $50.  You choose what tapas you want, and they bring a tiny portion.  It's good if you want to try some different foods, or to help you avoid ordering a whole dinner and taking one bite, scrunching your face, pushing the plate away, and saying, "I can't eat that!!  It's still alive!"  The portions are so tiny, however, that you may have to cut a croquet the size of your little finger into 4 parts.  That's why when I have tapas... I go order a pizza after we leave the restaurant!

Now this is good...real good.  Usually, I get coffee con leche and a pastry... but on this particular morning I noticed that someone at a table next to me had this drink.  It was a coffee con leche, however, instead of milk, it had condensed milk.  Mucho sweeter.  Like I needed that kicker in the ticker.  I was speeding my brains out!  Could have written a novel in thirty minutes.  Changed the oil in my car in 10.

 

    One thing I can't get use to is the graffiti.  Everywhere.  On the ATM screens.  On people's homes, on their businesses. I hear people defend this and I take out my small can of spray paint and scribble nonsense on their forehead.  Wow!  Do they have a change of heart.
    Come on Europeans!  Grow a backbone and cane these little malfeasant bastards!  Go Singapore on them!
No one has a right to do that to someone else's property.  It just isn't nice.

This is a sign that you see all through the state of Andalucia.  I'm not sure about the No and Do part, put the figure eight in the middle represents a knot, as in Andalucians are tied together with the King of Spain,  It is meant to send a message to Madrid that even though  several states in Spain that would break free and become their own countries if they could, Catalunya (Barcelona) and the Basque region on the French border, Andalucia is loyal to their King!!
     No doubt this has a double effect:
1) the King sleeps better knowing that at least 1/3 of the people support him and 2) Andalucia has much better  roads!

You gotta admit:  These little grocery stores are like shopping in Lego Land.  I love them because I can save mucho bucks rather than eating out.  But like Albertson's, Frye's??  Whoa!!  And the best part are the little carts for groceries.  Repeat after me:
Zoom Zoom!!

Okay and now for the original reason we went to Tarifa. It's only 15 miles from Africa. Morocco to be exact.  More on that later.   As for Tarifa, nothing but good memories.  The beach is on the Atlantic and it was a bit nippy, however, people were swimming...they just weren't named Zack or Steve!

The answer is nothing!  The two boofs are not CIA - they are turistas trying to blend in as locals while having a coffee in a outdoor cafe.  The old man is playing his accordion with the greatest sales/bum pitch ever:  Por favor... Por favor, leche para mi cachorro!   Please, milk for my puppy!  He could have added accordion lessons and got just as much money.

Seville - city of jacarandas

We started in Madrid, then up to Segovia (not on the map but it's about 60 miles NW of Madrid), then on to Avila, (not on the map but it's about 40 miles NW of Madrid) and now we're in Sevilla! Sevilla is about  6 hours southwest from Madrid.

Seville - which the Spanish pronounce as Say- Bee -ya, has it's own Alcazar (castle) which rambles on forever.  Gazillions of rooms, huge gardens, and beautiful patios.  

The Alcazar is built in typical Moorish style - Mudejar  - pronounced Moo day jar, NOT muddy jar!  I've noticed several things about castles, mansions, alcazars, and chateaus:
1. I'll never be able to afford them.
2. No one I hang with will ever be able to afford them.
3. They are not built for casual lounging about.
4. No one I've ever known will ever be able to afford them.

Zack was actually awestruck by the palace. I figured he would be ready to leave asap...you know... seen one 1000 year old mansion/castle...seen 'em all.  But he wanted to stay!  By all means, let's soak up this history!

I love the doorways that look like giant keyholes.  As you peer through this doorway you can see one of the flying buttresses on the cathedral of Seville.
    The seated man in the white shirton the far right  is the "vigilante".  I'm not making this up.  He's the "guard",  He's suppose to be watching out for bad people.  He must be very good at his job as he never stood up  or even looked up, despite 1000's of people that walked through the gates.
    He's what's known as a
"sitting buttress"...

To an adult, it's cute.  Maybe even adorable.  BUT... To a fellow student with anger issues...it's an open invitation for one serious butt-kicking.

Ohhhhh.... it's his  outfit for First Communion, cool!!  Really cool.  Just don't send him to school like this!!

Now these pictures deserve to be in the Prado!!

Purple rain!

 

Yes!  Yes!! It's true!
Zack and I have found a way to make money as we travel through Spain.  We are now Flamenco dancers!
Ole!

For 14E, we were in a little hole-in-the-wall dive that's been around since before Columbus was turned into an accordion-sized corpse, given a free drink -
a) watered down sangria or b) local beer called CruzCampo,  CruzCrappo as it is known amongst the tourists!.
But the show was the real deal.  Incredible amount of energy.  The guitarist was equally talented.  Made me realize just how many talented people walk by you on the street every day and you would never guess in what field they are talented.

I wonder if people recognize my talent when they pass me on the street. My talent is, "the ability to recognize and appreciate great food!"


After a good day of castle climbing and flamenco dancing, what better way to cap the day than with a cold glass of sangria and a plate of paella!
Muy sabroso!!

Seville - The Cathedral

        The town of Seville is one of three must see towns in the southern state/province of Andalusia.  all have beautiful castles and cathedrals.  Seville's cathedral is the largest Gothic cathedral in the world.   I love how cities promote their tourist attractions:  Our cathedral is the LARGEST cathedral in the WORLD...that was built my left handed midgets.  Or... our cathedral is the largest EVER built in the world that faces west and that has a post office across the street.
What's really amazing is that it works.  We'll be sitting at outdoor cafe and listening to the conversation at the table next to us:
Abner:  Sooo... where are you off to today?
Elmer:  We're thinking of taking the day trip up to Palookaville to see the cathedral.
Abner:  Oh, we've read about it!!  It sounds amazing!
Elmer:  Yeah, it's the largest ever built by left handed midgets!
Abner:  Wee people.
Elmer:  Yes, I am going to the restroom before we get on the bus!

But... Seville's cathedral is very impressive.  Check it out:

We climbed the 300 steps to the top and found that there are several truths about the olden days:
a)  there was no air-conditioning
b) the people were considerably shorter and thinner
c) an elevator salesperson would have made a killing
d) I have no desire to live back then

Thoughts that came to mind:

a) Wow!  I hope they are well hung
b) I hope they don't ring
c) Do the neighbors share the enthusiasm of hearing those bells every hour on the hour
d)  Perhaps the Church could make a few extra bucks by putting in a Verizon antenna ...

Seriously,
 the vibration from the bells must shake the foundation of the tower, if not the entire church.  How come it has not crumbled the tower... I know!!!
It's a friggin' miracle!!

The views from the top of the bell tower are awesome.  Seville has 703,000 people and an unusually large amount of deaf people...not sure why... but they all live near the cathedral...

One way that they cathedral builders helped account for the vibrations from the bells were to use a building technique called, "Flying buttresses".  No that is not a Stevenism.  It's a real term.  It's those arms you see attached to the sides of the walls.  The "FB's", as we architects call them, simply brace the walls and keep them from falling out and down... which is a bad thing if you are an architect... or the gardener working in the church garden.

      Two views of the bullring of Seville.  Supposedly the biggest in Spain and the most popular.  Unfortunately for us and fortunately for the bulls, we missed the bull fighting season.  Seriously, they have a bull fighting season?? What, they wear jerseys?  Have pep rallies, tail gate parties??  Here's a bull fighting joke for you... compliments of David:
Man goes into a restaurant in Seville and asks for the specialty of the house.
Waiter: Si senor. Today there was a bull fight and we proudly serve our "Cajones del dia"
Man: Hmmm.... that sounds interesting.  What exactly are "Cajones del did?"
Waiter:  Ahh senor... Today it is the testicles of he who fought so gallantly today in the bullring.
Man:  We'll... I guess... if it is your specialty... bring me the cajones del did!
So the man eats the cajones and loves them so much he brings his friends to the restaurant the next day.
Waiter:   Welcome back, señor. What will you have today?
Man:  Those cajones were so good, bring us an order of cajones!
Waiter: Si, senor.   and he goes to the kitchen and returns with cajones much bigger than the day before.
Man:  Are you sure these are cajones? The ones I had yesterday were so much smaller??
Waiter:  Si Senor.  But today the bull lost!  Yesterday it was the matador who lost!

This is the river that so many explorers set sail from when they left for the New World.  It's a river in Seville that once was deep and wide enough to sail from Seville to the ocean.  Unfortunately, for Seville, which is 200 miles from the sea, it spelled the economic doom for Seville for centuries to come.  The city didn't die, it just didn't flourish, which means they didn't have lots of modern buildings.  Fortunately, for Seville, they have a great tourism department and they learned to market,"Don't miss Seville - unchanged over the centuries by progress!" 

and speaking of explorers.. That's Columbus who is in that tomb.  Apparently, he was teeny tiny, or they folded him like and accordion. 

Avila - the Walled City

When you hear people talk about, "times were so simple back then..." they must be talking about Y1000, because can you imagine protecting a city by building a wall around it?  That's what those Romans did in 1100.  Yes, those same Aqueduct building, Christians torturing, crazy helmeted fools...the Romans
      The town of Avila, Spain, has the best preserved Roman walls in all of Spain if not the world...and the best part is, you can walk about 1/4 of a mile on top of them.  Makes you feel like grabbing a crossbow and taking out a few pedestrians below.... oops...that's the Roman in me.
"I'm sorry your honor but I please innocent by reason of genetic engineering... You see... I'm a Roman!"

From Segovia, we took a two hour bus ride.
Excellent bus.
  Some of them have WiFi.  Those that don't "give me" an opportunity to read, "The Sun Also Rises", by Hemingway, on my Kindle!  I can read about four chapters and then it's good night Irene... no offense Ernesto!

Upon arriving in Avila - BOOM -

 there's the walled in city.  

You can't miss it!

Uhhhhh.... Zack, you can put the map away now.  

We found the wall... in fact... we're on the wall!

Hard to imagine how the city could ever fall without the help of an F-16 or a howitzer?

and what's the best way to end a perfect day of wall walking... 

 with Paella and sangria... and some more sangria... and some more sangria...

Whew... all that wall walking is making me a bit dizzy!  

Oh Those Romans!!

Oh Those Romans!!





So what do Romans have to do with Segovia?  Well... like in most of Western Europe, they were in Segovia, Spain.  Personally, I am glad they were, but I'm not so sure of the Segovians of 2,000 years ago.  I'm very tired right now and won't write much but wanted to share one of the most awesome sights this side of solar flares - The Aqueduct of Segovia.
     Here's the scenario - Roman... when they weren't killing people, were building amazing things... like aqueducts.  Basically an aqueduct is a glorified water pipe.

The Segovians had no water so the Romans built an aqueduct to pipe the water that was 9 miles away in the mountains to the city and eventually to the Alcazar ... Ahhh... what's an alcazar?  An Alcazar is an Arab castle.  This Alcazar was originally a Roman castle, then the Arabs took it over (now you know how the rest of the world feels, Mr. Roman conqueror!).
Why not just move the city to the water?  I do not know all the details.  I just know that my Roman ancestors, aside from making chariot bombs, and arranging for people to "sleep with the fishes", could build things with the best of them.  For some reason, they thought it was easier to cut 20,000 stones, build 118 arches and gradually slope it for nine miles, than it was to say to the Segovians, "MOVE!"
    The aqueduct is about 100 feet at the highest and yes...it even impressed Zack!

   Check out these photos.




Just think:  No really... just think.  (sorry)
People walk right by this every day and I'm sure at some point, take it for granted.  Not me.  I'd touch that sucker every day.  No concrete. No mortar.  No Elmers.  No super glue!  Pretty darn impressive.

What is so cool is that like any good plumbing job, there has to be a slope from the top of one end of the pipe to the bottom of the other end of the "pipe" so that gravity does the work. To the naked, or even clothed eye, the aqueduct looks level, but it is actually sloping.  At some point it goes  underground.


Segovia, (did I mention that I love that city)  puts these brass   <<<<  markers in the ground to signify that the aqueduct is buried underground beneath the markers.  There are 24 such markers through out the city streets.  Zack and I had a bet that the first person to spot one would pay the other one whole Euro.  He agreed (fool!!)  I showed him the picture on my phone. 

My favorite picture of the summer!

Zachary going Jason Bourne on me!  Notice how there is no mortar between the stones.  They're just cut to order and are wedged in such a way as to hold each other in place.  Oh those talented Romans!

This is the top of the trough which is on top of the aqueduct.  The pipe itself.  I wonder if one of those Romans, upon completing this masterpiece of architecture said:

Claudius - "Hmmmmm....perhaps we should have made it a little bigger?

Antony - Bah!  You think too much.  In a few years it'll all be replaced by PVC.
Claudius - Good point.  Come on.  Let's go get six pack of vino.

It looks like the knight is saying, "Okay, so the cannon didn't fire.  What you're going to have to do is look down the barrel and..."

Lesson #224 - Never trust anyone that has to be oiled in order to walk.

Before leaving Segovia, I want to show you the bad, the  good, and the best.

The bad.   If this doesn't make me want to be a vegetarian nothing will.  It's a specialty of the area called, "cochinillos as ado"   which I believe  translates to,  "tortured and inappropriately displayed pig".  I know.  I know.  I eat beef and pork.  BUT!!   It's not like they were tortured.  They just take a metal rod to the head bone and BAM!  they're done!

The good.  White bean stew.  Of course, you could make the argument that hundreds of innocent beans were killed to make the stew.  Can you imagine the horror they experienced as they were indiscriminately plucked from their peaceful existence and thrown into a pot of scalding water??  Life sucks, man.  Life really sucks!  I'm starting to think that man can't live unless he's killing something!  

and the BEST.

No commentary necessary...  

...okay maybe just this:  How in the world could you leave them to go to work in the morning?!?!